Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize