She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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