She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
