ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
