Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize
