garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
