Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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