I like my sex mixed with concussions.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize