Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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