Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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