went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Randomize
