and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
