some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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