I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
