I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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