Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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