Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
