I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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