don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I need a burrito and a hug.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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