I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Randomize
