it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
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