i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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