You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
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