dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
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