clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
