They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
