ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
