O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
