she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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