My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
