I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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