I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
