I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
