he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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