Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Randomize
