in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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