He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize