1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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