You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
