dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
