My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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