I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
