im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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