so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Randomize
