Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
