Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
