The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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