I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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