There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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