The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I'm both gender and math confused
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
