Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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