gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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