I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
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FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
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Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.