Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug

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(519): View more from Ontario

Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.

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(714): View more from California

my room smells like sperm. sweet.

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(303): View more from Colorado

i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(812): View more from Indiana

Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.

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(618): View more from Illinois

It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night

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(914): View more from New York

The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella

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